I'm feeling a little light-headed and mediocre about things as of late. Maybe it's because I'm singing tenor for "O Holy Night" and just got out of practice.

More updates later.

So tomorrow's Thanksgiving.

Whoopty-freakin-do.

Thanks for coming down Dad. Better yet, thanks for calling me zero times in the past few months... That makes three consecutive Thanksgivings alone. But I don't really care quite as much as it seems I should.

Oh well. I'm gonna go have me a good time over at Jen's mom's house. She's an excellent cook, and I'm actually quite excited about hanging out over there tomorrow. I was supposed to work, but I guess they gave out all the overtime to other people before I had a chance to grab it. To tell you the truth i'm kind of glad the burden of choosing to work six days this week was lifted by me not having the choice. I am quite looking forward to sleeping in.

Well, if there was something particularly awesome to say, I would say it.

Alas, the only thing extreme about this day was it's extreme mediocrity, so i'll stop right about here. I'd get a haircut tomorrow if the barbershop was open.

"i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)"

-e.e. cummings

Had an excellent weekend. Woot.

edit - I had a longer post but Blogger ate it. Crap on blogger.

Excerpt from "Biddings of Adieu"

"...I should not ache.
Though a veritable world apart,
the vine that bears the fruit
of our friendship still flourishes,
its roots buried deep in each of our gardens,
where fireflies dance in the twilight
and mason jars cradle wildflowers.
Picked for you."

-Joshua Frederick Mahn

"We are all freaks, as it turns out"

Really? And is this all inclusive, or just writers? Sometimes I think I'm drastically weirder than the average guy, but then, that's probably because I rarely realize that other people think too. And rightfully so, since my thought pattern, and my ideas, are all I've ever known. For all I know, someone else may think totally differently than me.

Probably not though. I think I'm just self-centered, which I'm working on.

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skillfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and
my life will shut very beautifully,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the colour of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

-e.e. cummings

AHHHH HAHAHAHA!

"The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places."

- Ernest Hemingway

I heard something that pierced me deeply yesterday. A guy said, "people know they're going to die, they just don't actually believe it will happen. If people believed they could die, life would be much more dear."

I want things, and I'm not being effective enough for the cause of Christ. I've been trying (albeit feebly) to eliminate the circumstances that cause me discontent so that I can focus on only desiring God. Last night I sat alone in my dimly lit living room and thought to myself for about three hours, through a long stretch of silence with no human interaction. It did give me a chance to evaluate my life a little and see what's really important in all this mess, and I'm persuaded that I focus too much on stuff that hinders my ministry for Christ. The Bible says that I'm called to be a saint, separated unto the gospel of God, from which I received so great a salvation. I'm left here for a reason, and it doesn't make sense that I'm here to gain that Lexus I want, or that three story mansion, or even that great wife. For right now, I don't need any of those things, and in the past year or two (or three) I've been totally focused on some of them, and some other extraneous things. I've forgotten my first love, and I'm tired of the cycle I spin that chases me to love myself most, then someone else, then back to God, then back to myself, etc. Quite frankly, I'm getting dizzy and feeling nauseous from it. I hope I stay here for a while.

Just so everyone knows, my email address is disabled. My new email address is Sprite777@lycos.com.

Please update your address books accordingly. Oh, and it's been off since about two or three weeks ago, so if you sent anything in that time frame, please know that I didn't get it, and forward it to my new email address. Thanks, guys.

---

I just looked through my sitemeter, and apparently someone emailed my site to someone else, and they clicked on the link... That's cool, I think. Too bad I can't see who it was too or from...

Yesterday was eerily beautiful. It was one of those days where the change in temperature seemed almost negligable - where the wind was never still, but time was. The air was just brisk enough to require a jacket, and from morning to sunset, that feeling was amazingly perpetual. The clouds weren't ominous, nor were they pleasant. They blanketed us and muffled the light in a way that we couldn't tell, really, where the sun was, or whether it was morning or evening. It was such a powerful scene: from what I remember, the clouds were rushing assiduously across the earth, in an almost neverending manner.

And from what I remember, I was the only one that noticed.

Thursdays with Meg.

moochergrl: laaaaaaaaaaaaaa
FrogBoy777: Whooooooooooooooomp!
moochergrl: bbbboooooooooooooom
FrogBoy777: faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart
moochergrl: eeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwww
FrogBoy777: tttttttttttttttttttttttree
moochergrl: tree?
FrogBoy777: yeah... that was a little out of place.
FrogBoy777: badoonkadoooooooonk
moochergrl: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmm
FrogBoy777: burp
FrogBoy777: i mean
FrogBoy777: buuuuuuuuuuuurp
moochergrl: niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiceeeeeee
FrogBoy777: buuuuuuuuurn
moochergrl: haaaaaa
FrogBoy777: looooooooool
FrogBoy777: ...
FrogBoy777: ...?
FrogBoy777:
moochergrl: wha?
moochergrl: lool?
FrogBoy777: lol = loooooooool
FrogBoy777: yeah
moochergrl: ahhhhh
FrogBoy777: ahhhh!
FrogBoy777: haaaaaaaa!
moochergrl: hmmmmm
FrogBoy777: yummmmmm


I submit to you that this is the most profound conversation I've had in a while.

Jen has a blog everyone!

If we were at the discotec (that's right I said discotec) I'd play her favorite groove track.

Just call me... Disco Stu.

Posts of substance have been lacking of late. Even among other blogs I usually read, but this event will be among the weirdest in my life for a long time.

My heart was heavy yesterday, and I was a bit weary and frustrated after the Bible study last night. So I actually came home, read through most of First and Second Corinthians, highlighted important stuff, and seriously, fervently worked toward some sensical conclusion on a few issues. This took about two hours, so I went to put some clothes in the dryer from the washer. Unfortunately, I washed my wallet and everything in it was soaked. There was a check in it, so I assumed it was ruined and dragged back to my room in lament over my would-have-been money. I decided I would let the check dry for a little while, which to my surprise actually worked, but the check was a little wrinkled still from the dampness, so I decided to put it in the back of my Bible to make it straight again.

Earlier that evening, when I was studying, I had opened two of the four drawers in my dresser to look for a highlighter, which I finally found in the top drawer, but I didn't close the drawers. When I later put the check in my Bible, I placed the Bible on the corner of the top drawer so I would see it this morning before work.

I laid down in prayer and prayed for certain things that needed the Lord's attention, but at the end I prayed that I would have good dreams and that the Lord would wake me up so I wouldn't be late for the first day of work. Besides, the only reason I stayed up until 1:30 was to read something he had for me to read, so I didn't think the request was unmeritted.

My alarm was already set for 6:40am and I didn't think it would have been a problem, except that after praying and thinking and praying and thinking, it was about 2am, and I'm a big sleeper. At 6:34 this morning, I was awakened by a violent, obscene thud, that probably woke the whole neighborhood! I jolted up, and from what I remember, I was in shock and stared at the mess for three or four minutes without moving, and with an open-mouthed, gasping sort of look on my face.

My entire dresser had fallen headlong on to my floor with all its contents slam shut inside the housing and everything on top had flown across my room! As I sat on my bed (after the three or four minutes of utter shock), I started rapidly thinking of anything that could have caused this.

I thought maybe the cat could have accidentally pushed it forward, but then I thought it would have been too heavy for him to push, and the space behind the dresser was way too narrow for a cat to enter. Then I remembered that I don't even have a cat, at which point I moved on to my next idea. I thought maybe my roommate was playing a terrible, horrible, no-good, dirty-rotten prank on me, where he just quickly opened my door pushed over my dresser, then closed the door and went back to bed before I saw him. Then I remembered that that's a rediculously stupid idea.

The whole time I was thinking that I must get up and fix the mess, but after I couldn't think of anything to have caused it, I assumed that my room was filled with demons and if I touched the thing, I would be touching something that was demonically influenced to fall over. And that just freaked me out tenfold what I had been prior.

After my mind stopped its overload cycle, I realized that it had been my careless placement of my huge Bible on the open top drawer that had caused the near-fatal (ok, maybe not) catastrophe. It was top heavy (since the bottom drawer was empty) and just fell over under too much stress. But... why had it kept its center of gravity for five hours? Why did it fall six minutes before my alarm went off? It certainly woke me up and literally petrified me for minutes after my awakening.

Then I remembered my prayer for Him to wake me up, and all was well. I cleaned up and started getting ready for work.
Thanks, Lord.

He even uses my mistakes for the good of me, who loves Him.